3/18/2024
2:08 am
This is kind of a long story. It was one of my first attempts at dialogue. I’m still trying to get that down and writing short stories.
Day 4 – Sent to the Wrong Printer
You’re at work and you print something personal (and sensitive). Unfortunately, you’ve sent it to the wrong printer and, by the time you realize it, somebody else has already scooped it up.
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The thoughts racing through Kelly’s mind were putting her into a panicked state “Oh my god, I can’t believe I just did that.” “What was I thinking?” “Why was I in such a hurry to print my documents without looking at the file name?” “I never send personal items to the printer here at work.”
She didn’t know who picked up the stack of papers off the printer. An office this size with over a hundred people in and out on this floor could be anybody.
Kelly tried to rationalize her thoughts. “Think, did I have my name anywhere on the paper?” “No.” “No, I don’t think so.” “Just today’s date, I think.“ “Someone will figure out which people I was talking about, it’s going to be so obvious.” “How many people work in my department?” “Less than twenty?”
After rationalizing started helping her calm down, Kelly started thinking of why it happened. “How could I be so stupid?” “I know things have been stressful with this new project but I should have never typed up what I thought of certain co-workers.”
It was just an “in the moment” thinking and journaling during stress was a habit she had developed. It was used to cope better but she never did it at work only in private at home. “Thank god it doesn’t have anyone’s names on it just the codenames I gave them.”
Jason “The Jerk”, Stacey “The Snitch”, Carl “Captain Obvious” and George “The Grunt” were the names she had been calling them in her mind for a while now. Kelly had been working on this project for six weeks and not one of her team members meshed well from the start.
Their team meeting that morning did not go well with the division head and he wanted to see progress or else. The team was unprepared as usual but today was even more so. Kelly’s thoughts of what happened popped into her mind “We should have never gotten together over the weekend; it has made everything worse.”
Captain Obvious had called a team meeting after work last Friday. They got together to have some drinks in the bar down the street.
The Grunt didn’t want to go because he was married and didn’t want to make his wife mad if he was late again. The Jerk made some comments aimed at The Grunt to man up and take charge. The Snitch was quieter than usual and just sat back and watched.
Kelly did her best to make light of it and smooth things over, as usual. This time it wasn’t working.
Which of course were the same words Captain Obvious brought up, “We are not working as a group.” Everyone’s eyes rolled and some comments were made under someone’s breath about our so-called “fearless leader”.
Oblivious to the reaction, Captain Obvious went on with the so-called rehearsed speech about teamwork. Kelly admired him for his attempt to gain back control.
The Snitch just laughed, her Tequila Sunrise was kicking in. The Jerk just sat there staring at his phone pretending not to hear and occasionally sipping on his Red Bull and Vodka. The Grunt, sipping on his Scotch, kept looking at his watch and the door like he was expecting his wife to walk in any moment.
Kelly sat back, listened intently, and took it all in nursing her bottle of beer. After, Captain Obvious’ speech, Kelly asked the burning question in everyone’s mind “So, do we tell the boss that the project is at a dead end and the team needs to be disbanded?” Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at Captain Obvious.
Kelly was thinking about the team meeting over the weekend, it was now Monday afternoon after their disastrous meeting with the division head this morning when she was trying to come up with a way to keep the team momentum moving forward when her thoughts started wandering and out of habit she started typing, journaling the thoughts:
When this project started everyone was picked because of the strengths they had and we all had already proven our abilities on other projects. This time though there were too many “A” players on one team but I think that’s why we were all chosen for that project to find out if were the best of the best within our division or were good at making it seem like we knew what we were doing.
The Jerk has a strong background in analytics. He has this uncanny ability to be able to see the end goal before anyone else and always has the numbers to back him up. A newly graduated college student and former star athlete whose playing days are over, he is making his presence known but in the interim stepping on anyone and everyone in his travel to the top.
His inability to listen to other seasoned players is his weakness but he thinks everyone is just “old school” and looking for people to follow him. At first, he played it cool, pretending to take an interest in the same things, asking questions, and being helpful, and then whenever he saw someone crumbling or coming up short due to the pressure of a deadline or task he pointed it out to the higher-ups then proceeded to take it over.
A lot of people do not trust him. What he doesn’t know is that he has been playing the “old school” game and is just a guppy in the little pond. The big sharks know about him and are waiting for him to get their level. Poor kid, he’s on the fast track to nowhere.
The Snitch has a strong background in development. She has the great ability to manage timelines and project management through her organizational skills but lacks confidence in her ability to lead.
She’s always been this “background” person. She believes that if she finds all the faults and issues within a team or project she must report to the higher-ups everything. I mean everything.
If someone is late to a meeting or forgets to sign something it goes into her “weekly” team reminders that the higher-ups are also copied on. It is overkill and everyone she has ever worked with knows it.
People roll their eyes whenever her name is mentioned. She is fairly new but has been with the company for more than 3 years but still has not fit in. She does good work but her personality is lacking. She will never lead a team. No one has faith in her ability to lead.
The Grunt is particularly good at multi-tasking and research. He has been with the company for more than 7 years and should be a manager by now but sometimes he will multi-task himself out of opportunities that come along because he’s also indecisive.
He’s newly married with a baby on the way. His wife used to work for the company as well but resigned after she found out about the pregnancy to become a stay-at-home mom. She was notorious for her work ethic and was on the fast track to a high-level position but she fell in love with the Grunt.
Knowing that he is in her shadow has made him a somewhat disgruntled worker. His wife doesn’t help with her constant calling and “advice”. Guess the stay-at-home routine is becoming boring for her and she’s still trying to maintain control. Poor guy needs to “man up” and stand his ground otherwise he’ll never come out from the dark.
Captain Obvious is a mid-career manager and has been with the company for more than 15 years. He has led many teams and projects. The Jerk was correct that Captain Obvious is “old school”. He doesn’t have a clue about anything recent as it relates to organizational management and leadership.
This project is his do-or-die moment. If he can’t lead a group of fairly young new business-minded people then he’s done. The higher-ups will probably ship him off to one of the divisions that will be disbanded within the next 5 years just so he can retire.
He has this vast knowledge of the company and its inner workings but doesn’t share that information. He’s not that “stupid” according to the Snitch and the Jerk agreed. So he just does what he can to get by when assigned to projects and relies on everyone else doing their part with little guidance from him until now.
Then there is me. I’ve been with this company for 5 years and transferred to this division last year. I’ve always been good at fixing programs and processes that weren’t working.
Quality Assurance is my main bread and butter. Finding a cost-effective way to get projects done and on time is what I specialize in but determining the weakest links has been my main focus.
I unfortunately got nicknamed the “Terminator” by the last team project I worked on and it stuck with me even when I transferred. Teams don’t like to work with me because they think that I’m out to get them fired which is not what happens but it has become this interoffice urban myth that I can’t shake.
No one has ever been fired because of my reports or work, not that I know of anyway. My job on the teams is to see where the processes in the project can break down over time and what will it cost the company in the end to fix.
Find the problems before they become bigger and have a backup plan in place just in case. I just provide oversight to a project and aid in their process but still, they don’t trust me because of the misnomer.
The past week’s events spilled forward during the team get-together due to too many drinks and the frustrations of people just not getting along with each other.
The Jerk got into a physical altercation with the Grunt after his wife called for the tenth time that evening. I think the “get a pair” comment didn’t sit well with the Grunt and is what pushed him over the edge. They both had bruises on their faces. Both ended up in the ER, one with a broken finger and the other with a broken nose.
The Snitch recorded everything on her phone which was snatched out of her hand by Captain Obvious and promptly thrown into the street which was unfortunately run over by a well-timed street sweeper.
The Snitch was so upset she hit Captain Obvious over the head with her purse. Captain Obvious was so caught off guard he fell backward, slipped off the curb, and unfortunately broke his tailbone. Another victim off to the same ER.
She was still hitting him with her purse when I tried to pull her off of him and then had the misfortune of having my hair grabbed by the Snitch and lost a chunk in the process. I was really surprised and caught off guard and didn’t know what else to do with the Snitch except shove her away.
The Snitch’s high heel made this loud snapping noise as she stumbled backward and fell into a group of people walking out of the bar. A drunk woman in the group got mad and punched her in the face. She now has a black eye.
That Monday morning the team had a meeting with the division head scheduled. They all showed up to the breakroom early that morning to get their “stories” straight but Kelly didn’t think it was going to help.
The looks on their co-worker’s faces this morning would have made for a great sitcom moment. The whispers and pointing started well before their meeting.
The incredulous look on the division head’s face as the “stories” were told was not a good sign. He barked at Carl and said, “I don’t know what happened this past weekend and I don’t want to know.” He stated that either they find a way to get the project done or start working on their resumes.
They agreed and said they would get it done. After the division head left the conference room there was nothing but silence. They just looked at each other. Nothing was said about the weekend. They had agreed to never bring it up earlier that morning.
The tasks for that week were handed out by Stacey, which Carl looked over and made some adjustments. Jason said he had numbers ready to go for one of last week’s tasks and then George said he would review it with him at lunch. They were getting along a lot better now.
Kelly just sat there and watched the interactions between each of them. Despite all the petty arguments and disagreements, the past weekend’s misadventure seemed to bring the team back on track.
After the meeting, Kelly was lost in thought when Carl came by and asked about a report on which she was working. He wanted to see a rough draft so she printed it and told him it would be on the printer. He left.
She had stopped journaling her thoughts about the weekend and had been looking through some spreadsheets when Carl poked his head in the door and said he couldn’t find the report, it wasn’t on the printer. Kelly looked at her screen and blinked a few times because that’s when it hit her. She hadn’t sent the report to the printer, she had sent the journal entry instead. To make matters worse, she had sent it to the printer on the main floor.
She could feel her face getting hot and Carl looking concerned, asked if she was okay. “Um, yeah…I’ll print it again and drop it by your office.” He wandered off down the hall.
Kelly got up quickly and hurried to the main floor. It was a busy, noisy place but all she could hear was her heartbeat, it was deafening.
She went to the bank of printers and started going through every stray piece of paper left on the desks and thrown in the recycling bin. It wasn’t there.
She stood there and waited for items to print going through them before they finished. It never printed.
She was starting to feel the panic slowly rise from her gut and started to feel light-headed. She looked around. No one was paying attention to her or so she thought. Little did she know but the Hawk had been watching her the whole time. He was patiently waiting for her to head back to her office.
She slowly made it back to the office thoughts of the paper being posted on the bulletin board in the break room for all to see came into her mind. “This will break down what little cohesion the team has left and they will lose any trust they had in me.” “What did I just do?”
She was blankly staring at the window when the Hawk stepped into her cubicle. “Were you looking for these?” She turned around quickly, felt her face getting hot again, and the thoughts just wouldn’t turn into words. She looked at the paper in his hands. It was her journal entry.
She looked up and managed a weak “Thank You”. The Hawk, also known as Uncle Henry, gave her a stern look. She felt like she was getting ready to get grounded and was 12 all over again.
He said, “Like I said this morning, I don’t know what happened and I don’t care, just get this project done”. He gave her a quick nod and a wink then said, “Nice haircut”. He walked away. Kelly shredded the journal entry, quickly printed out the rough draft, and went to retrieve it for the team leader Carl.
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Thank you for stopping by.
Have a fabulous week!
Peace, love, happiness, and good vibes, always!
Suzanne
love to bake 