Crossing Paths: The people we meet

6/23/2024

5:03 pm

This is a rewrite and completion of a blog article I never posted in October 2020. I was cleaning out some of my digital clutter and found this.

In a weird coincidence, it applies to my conversation with my online relationship over the last two days about how we communicate.

These thoughts came to me this afternoon about people.

After mulling things over most of the day, I began to see some things clearer and it was eye-opening that I did not realize before, or maybe I chose to ignore it. I am not sure.

Every day we go out and about into the world and we cross paths with people no matter where we are.

The only thing that changes is whether the people we meet become more involved in our lives. This is dependent on the way we carry ourselves and how we are perceived by others. Our expectations change.

When I go into stores or I am out and about, which is not very often, I try to always be polite, say “Thank you” and “Have a nice day.” It is a habit.

Yet, when I am there in that moment there is no expectation that I will get the same courtesy in return. If I do not receive it back, it does not matter. Honestly, most of the time I am unaware or not paying attention. I only notice when the people are rude, obnoxious, or less than helpful. Then I get irritated. My reactions then reflect what I am perceiving.

After having this thought, it ballooned into the people that I have met over my lifetime. I began thinking back to how we met and why they are not here in my life now.

The people we meet daily are just this momentary blip of human connection. The people we have more memories of were path changers and their purpose was to move us in other directions.

As I thought back to some of these people whether it was relationships, friendships, classmates, or coworkers, they all were on the path to help me change direction. Even though I had great attachment or fondness for some of them, they did not reciprocate, and that is why they did not stay.

The men in my lifetime were there for me to discover the traits that are appealing to me as well as the behaviors that I want to avoid. It was just to prepare me for the one that I would find one day on this path. I know what I am and am not comfortable with as it pertains to a relationship. I became very forthright about this to the men I met. This was part of the discussion with my online relationship.

The person I want in my life must be humorous or at least enjoy humor. They must be willing to be silly sometimes even in the most serious moments. Laughter in your life is so much better than sadness.

He must be willing to grow not only the relationship but himself too. He must be willing to continually learn new things and share what he knows. He must be compassionate, caring, and honest. He must be open and willing to share himself while knowing that his confidence in me will always match the confidence I have in him. Two people dedicating their lives to one another cannot be successful without these things.

The women in my lifetime were only there as examples of how I want to carry myself and as well as the behavior I should avoid. They showed me how to be kind, and gracious, and how to be confident in who I am as a woman. They showed me how to maintain my strengths and abilities to be successful in whatever I pursue. They also showed me how to be a nurturer to others with compassion, caring, kindness, and honesty.

I learned from both groups how to be carefree sometimes and serious when it is warranted. I also learned that we sometimes have the same behaviors, idiosyncrasies, faults, misgivings, and insecurities. We as human beings are not perfect but that is okay, we were not meant to be.

There were also ones that changed my direction completely; these were usually the harshest lessons to learn. They made me sad, cry, feel alone, and unsure of myself. They hurt me emotionally and sometimes physically. I came back different than before I met them, never weaker but stronger and more determined. I was not the same after our interaction with one another and sometimes they changed too. They became the lessons in life, love, and relationships.

Then good people would come along who were there to pick me back up, dust me off, help me focus, and push me back onto the path. They made sure I did not repeat the lesson and reinforced any newfound confidence. They helped save me from myself. They are the ones I miss the most, but they were meant to be the helpers in the world and could not stay.

Then some people made this major depressive, anxiety-ridden, and insecure person, feel happiness. They made me laugh, dance, and enjoy life, even if it was just briefly. They were these momentary side trips on this journey.

We do not know how long our path in life will be. That is the secret the universe keeps to itself.

All we can do is keep crossing by each other and be lucky enough to have someone join us one day.

Hopefully, if we have done it right, we leave a large path for others to follow.

Thank you so much for stopping by.

Have a great week!

Peace, love, happiness, and good vibes, always!

Take care and be safe out there.

Suzanne